End of Year Frustration

Let me begin with this year has been a new change in our lives with the twins in kinder and Garrett in first grade, while Randy was in Pre-K. Our daily routine was wake up, get ready for school, while on way to school pick up breakfast, drop Randy off at day-care, and finally take the other three to school. You think that when your children go to school that they will get an education. I have come to realize that they get the TAKS come on what has happened Texas?

A little about my oldest three they we pre-exposed to drugs and alcohol due to the fact that their biological mother would not get clean for the sake of her children.
So my children struggle a lot, they have a hard time staying focused in class and even at home. I am the one that made the decision not to medicate just for the fact they were already exposed.

What has happened is that all of my children struggled through out the year but it was never brought to my attention until the last nine weeks. So then I had to go for meetings and special meetings with the department for extra help. Then it was another test to see if he was meeting guidelines then another then can you take him to the doctor. They want to do all this in the last weeks of school.

I am not sure what will be happening next year, I am really focusing on a private christian school. At times I just want to throw my hands up but I am a much stronger woman than that, but that doesn't mean I don't think about it.

On a better note my husband did get baptized last Sunday and that was awesome. Then we had a big bar-b-que at my parents with family. We do every thing with my family.

So much better to give than receive...

Today has been an exciting and wonderful day. I took the little ones to see Alvin and the Chipmunks the Sequel and they loed it. Honestly the entire audience was laughing through the entire movie. Not to mention when an 18 year old brother liked it then you know that is a great movie for the entire family. Once we were finished with the movie my family got together to take our gifts to our adopted feeling. There is nothing more humbling than to see the faces of people that are truly grateful for what they have. I looked into the eyes of a mother that is battling cancer that has 6 tumors that are inoperable, that has cancer of the bones, breasts, and lungs that said to me "it is a miracle that I am here today" and she was so right. The doctors told her that she would not even make it to Christmas. She has made it to Christmas with her children by her side. I could not stop the tears from flowing here she was praying to God that she makes it to Christmas with no gifts under the tree, not any food to eat and not once complained about her life but grateful for what life she has left. She was excited that she did not have to go back to radiation until Monday. Makes me wonder what is our lives really about? Are they about what fortunes we have? Is it about the type of home we live in; what kind of vehicle we own? Is it measured by the style of watch that we wear and the shoes we own. This is not how I want people to think of me. I have come to the conclusion that my life is not to be measured on what I have or had but rather on how I lived my life here on Earth once I am gone. You see when we enter this world we enter it with nothing and when we leave it we leave it the same way with nothing. I want people to remember me for the good things that I have done in my life, how I always wanted for others more than for myself. I want my children to carry on my legacy by what I have instilled in them. I want them to know that when we give to those in need it is so much better than to receive. I have to end this today with a hoping heart and a praying mind that God will touch those lives around us who so desperately need the praying and needs our prayers as well.

Another Day

So today is Saturday and I about to go shopping for the kiddos Christmas. Yesterday I had two sick kiddos it never fails that when one gets sick and just when they are getting well BAM the others are now sick. Even though I had Bailey and Randy home because they were sick we still had a wonderful time together. Anytime with my children is wonderful. Just the fact in having the children in my life is a pure BLESSING. Time to get ready let me get out and enjoy this day that the LORD has made I will rejoice and be GLAD in it.

My Family

Mostly everyone who knows me knows that I am a mother to four wonderful children. I have adopted 3 from Child Protective Services and have 1 biological child. I have a son Garrett that is 6, twins Bailey and Bodin that are 5, and Randy(Biological) that is 5 also. My journey to parenthood began when I could not conceive on my own with all the fertility treatments available. I had one round of IVF and when that did not work I knew right then and there that I could not go through that again and, I asked God to guide me on this journey. Through that decision I was led to adoption because it was always around me through friends of friends and someone always knew someone. So that is how my journey to parenthood began. My children that I adopted are of mixed races white and black or black and white. Their biological father was black and the biological mother was whit. I can honestly say that I see no color when I look at them they are simply my children, more often than not I get questions all the time as to if they are mixed and sometimes ugly looks from both sides of races. However once they know the story of them being adopted then all of a suddenly I am praised for what I have done. I do not deserve praise I believe that my God deserves praise for giving me the wonderful gift that he did. My life and my families life as been forever changed by these wonderful children and honestly it has changed for the better. I love my adopted children as I love my biological and believe it or not there is no difference I love them all exactly the same. These children are my life. I do worry about when they get older how children and adults will treat them. I dread the day that they are called niggers, or yellow. I know that my first instinct is going to be a mother protecting her children anyway I can, but that will not teach my children humanity just stupidity. There are many people out there that are cruel and see only colors of skin, I want my children to love all even those that are ugly on the inside. I long to teach forgiveness just as God forgives us.